Overview (Verse 29)

Visiting People When They Are Not Ready

Places that are more or less public, like hotels, guest houses and reception halls which are separate from the main house are treated differently. We may enter such places without first seeking permission, because the very reason for seeking permission before entry does not apply to them. Requiring permission first may be inconvenient in such places.

“You will incur no sin if you enter uninhabited houses in which you have something of use. God knows all that you do openly, and all that you would conceal.” (Verse 29) The point here is that of God’s knowledge of all our situations and what we do in public or private. The feeling that God watches us in all situations should make people more obedient and willing to observe the refined manners which He has outlined in His book that lays down a code of living for all humanity.

As a complete code for human life, the Qur’ān emphasizes this point of detail in social life because it aims to regulate life in all its aspects, bringing its details in line with its fundamental issues. Thus, seeking permission before entering other people’s homes respects the sanctity which makes the home a place of relaxation. It spares its people the embarrassment of being taken by surprise, or being seen in a situation that they prefer not to be seen in. We are not talking here only about the parts of the human body which should be covered. At home people may be in a situation which they simply do not like others to see. It could relate to their personal appearance, the way they dress or lay their furniture, or anything else. It could also relate to feelings and emotions. Who of us would like to be seen in a situation of weakness, crying or angry or in pain or distress?

The Qur’ānic code of manners attends to all these details through the requirement of seeking permission before entering someone else’s home. It also seeks to reduce chances of casual meetings or sightings that could arouse desire and develop into unacceptable relations that Satan may stealthily encourage. The first Muslim community to be addressed by the Qur’ān clearly understood such directives and their purpose. The Prophet himself was the first to implement them.

The Prophet visited Sa`d ibn `Ubādah, the chief of the Anşār, at home and sought permission, saying: “Assalāmu `alaykum wa raĥmatullāh”, meaning, peace and God’s mercy be bestowed on you. Sa`d replied in a low voice. His son, Qays, asked him: “Are you not letting God’s Messenger in?” Sa`d said: “Let him wish us peace more.” Again the Prophet repeated his greeting and Sa`d replied in a low voice twice more. Therefore, the Prophet departed, but Sa`d ran after him and explained what happened, saying: “Messenger of God, I certainly heard your greetings and replied quietly hoping that you would wish us peace more and more.” The Prophet went in with him. Sa`d ordered water to be brought for the Prophet to wash. Then he gave him a small blanket dyed with saffron to cover himself. The Prophet then raised his hands, praying: “My Lord, shower Your blessings and grace on Sa`d ibn `Ubādah’s family.” [Related by Abū Dāwūd and al-Nasā’ī]

The Prophet taught his Companions how to approach someone else’s home, saying: “If you come towards a home, do not face the door straight, but stand to the right or to the left, and say: Assalāmu alaykum! Assalāmu ‘alaykum!” At that time, there were no screens on doors. [Related by Abū Dāwūd]

Sa`d ibn Abī Waqqāş came to the Prophet and stood facing the door, seeking permission. The Prophet said to him: “Move this way or that way, because permission is sought before a person looks in.” [Related by Abū Dāwūd]

An authentic ĥadīth quotes the Prophet as saying: “If a person overlooks you without having obtained permission, and you hit him with a small stone, and cause him a severe injury in his eye, you have nothing to answer for.” [Related by al- Bukhārī and Muslim]

Rib`ī, a Companion of the Prophet, reports: “A man from the `Āmir clan sought permission to enter the Prophet’s home, saying: ‘Can I enter?’ The Prophet said to his servant: ‘Go to this man and teach him how to seek permission. Tell him to say: ‘Assalāmu `alaykum. May I come in?’ The man overheard the Prophet and said exactly that. The Prophet gave him permission and he entered.” [Related by Abū Dāwūd]

`Abdullāh ibn `Umar was walking, troubled by the heat, and he urgently needed to relieve himself. He approached a Qurayshi woman’s place, and said: “Assalāmu`alaykum. May I come in?” She said: “Enter with peace.” He repeated what he said, and she repeated her reply. He was unable to stand still. He told her to say: “Come in”, if she wanted to give him permission and she did so. He then entered.

`Aţā’ ibn Rabāĥ, a scholar who studied under `Abdullāh ibn `Abbās, the Prophet’s cousin whose scholarly knowledge was recognized as highly authoritative, reported: “I asked Ibn `Abbās: ‘Should I seek permission before entering when only my orphan sisters are at home considering that I look after them and they live with me in the same home?’ He said: ‘Yes.’ I asked him again so that he might give me a concession, but he refused. Instead, he asked me: ‘Do you like to see your sister undressed?’ I answered in the negative. He said: ‘Then seek permission before entry.’ I repeated the question once more, but he asked me: ‘Do you love to obey God?’ I said: ‘Yes.’ He said: ‘Then seek permission.’”

An authentic ĥadīth makes it clear that the Prophet prohibited a man from entering his own home unannounced so surprising his wife. In another version the prohibition is attached to such a surprise being made at night, implying that his family might be doing something unacceptable.

Another ĥadīth mentions that the Prophet arrived with his Companions at Madīnah during the day. So, he encamped at the outskirts, explaining his purpose: “Wait until the end of the day, so that a woman has a chance to attend to her uncombed hair, or remove unwanted hair on her body.”

Good Manners and High Morals

Such refined manners were characteristic of the Prophet and his Companions after God had taught them the Islamic way. Today, however, we find that such fine considerations are largely meaningless despite our being Muslims. A man may just turn up at his brother’s door at any time of the day or night, knocking hard and caring little for disturbing the people inside, until the door is opened. The people may have a telephone which provides an excellent way of seeking permission to visit before starting out. He could thus easily find out a time suitable to his hosts. Nevertheless, people simply do not take such steps. A man may arrive at someone’s home without a prior appointment or permission. What is worse, our social tradition makes it imperative that a visitor who has come unannounced be received, even though his visit might be extremely inconvenient.

We are certainly Muslims, but we surprise our friends at any moment, even at meal times. If we are not invited to a meal, we may feel aggrieved. We may even surprise them late at night, and if they do not invite us to stay the night, we are offended. We allow our hosts no excuses either way.

All this takes place simply because we neglect Islamic manners. We do not bring our own preferences in line with what has been taught by God’s Messenger. We insist on following a mistaken social tradition that has no divine authority.

We look at other, non-Muslim communities and find that their social traditions are closer to the values and manners Islam wants us to adopt. Sometimes we admire these, but at other times we may even ridicule them, without even trying to look into what Islam wants us to do.