Overview (Verses 222 - 223)
 
Purity in Sexual Relations
 
The next point the sūrah deals with is a delicate and most private one, but here again marital relations are elevated above the physical contact, even when the discussion is concerned with the most physical aspect of married life, namely, sexual relations:
 
They ask you about menstruation. Say: “It is an unclean condition; so keep aloof from women during menstruation, and do not draw near to them until they are cleansed. When they have cleansed themselves, you may go in unto them in the proper way, as God has bidden you. God loves those who turn to Him in repentance, and He loves those who keep themselves pure.’ Your wives are your tilth; go, then, to your tilth as you may desire, but first provide something for your souls. Fear God and know that you shall meet Him. Give the happy news to the believers. (Verses 222-223)
 
Within marriage, sex is not an end in itself, but a means to achieving much more profound goals in life, not least of which is reproduction and the continuation of human life. While it may satisfy the physical desire, sex during menstruation is not only unclean and carries health risks for both man and woman, but also fails to serve its fundamental objective. As a matter of fact, sex during menstruation is not very attractive to normal healthy people because it is not conducive to reproduction. Sound human nature tends to avoid it. On the other hand, during cleanliness sex fulfils the natural desire and achieves a natural objective. Therefore, the question raised is given a clear answer of prohibition: “They ask you about menstruation. Say: ‘It is an unclean condition; so keep aloof from women during menstruation, and do not draw near to them until they are cleansed.’” (Verse 222)
 
However, that is not the end of the matter. Sexual behaviour outside the menstruation period must conform to certain manners and standards of decency and propriety: “When they have cleansed themselves, you may go in unto them in the proper way, as God has bidden you.” (Verse 222) Here the sūrah points out that sexual intercourse is allowed only at the place where fertilization may take place. The immediate physical pleasure is not the only purpose of sexual intercourse; its higher purpose is the continuity of human life. God points out what He has made lawful, and a Muslim seeks what is lawful. Moreover, God’s laws are meant to purify His servants. Hence the statement: “God loves those who turn to Him in repentance, and He loves those who keep themselves pure.” (Verse 222)
 
The sūrah then defines this aspect of the marital relationship in the most poignant and affectionate terms, saying: “Your wives are your tilth; go, then, to your tilth as you may desire, but first provide something for your souls. Fear God and know that you shall meet Him. Give the happy news to the believers.” (Verse 223)
 
There can hardly be a more accurate and eloquent description of the nature and purpose of this aspect of the relationship between husband and wife. It is by no means a complete description of the marital relationship. Elsewhere in the Qur’ān we find other similarly befitting and powerful descriptions, such as: “They [your wives] are a garment and you are a garment to them.” (2: 187) “And of His signs is that He creates for you mates from your own selves, so that you may incline towards them, and He engenders between you love and compassion.” (30: 21)
 
Each of these statements describes an aspect of this most profound and important of human relationships. The use of the Arabic word ĥarth, rendered here as ‘tilth’, with its connotations of tillage and production, is most fitting, in a context of fertility and procreation. Within this healthy, warm and conducive atmosphere, couples may seek each other’s comfort in any manner that will give them the greatest and most fulfilling pleasure.
 
Sexual fulfilment must, therefore, be sought as part of an overall objective which serves to please God Almighty, and is beneficial to the individuals concerned. They will be further rewarded by God for respecting His teachings and abiding by them.
 
We have here a good example of the generosity and kindness of Islam. It is a religion that does not deny man any of his natural tendencies or instincts, or pretend to achieve human purity by suppressing or destroying man’s basic physical needs. Rather, Islam disciplines, guides and fosters these desires and needs in a manner that reinforces man’s humanity and invigorates his consciousness of, and relationship with, God. It seeks to blend physical and sensual tendencies with human and religious emotions, thus bringing together the transient pleasures and the immutable values of human life into one harmonious and congruent system that will render man worthy of being God’s vicegerent on earth. Being a system ordained by the Creator Himself, it will never clash with human nature or cause any human misery or unhappiness.